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Ed
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firstmuse
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May 31st, 2013

Reflection

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Ed
Sometimes sleep does the world of good, she can be like that if she wants, I know I wasn't in the wrong, but sometimes she acts like everything is an attack. Because this isn't the first time see has had that kind of reaction when I have been typing/texting her. I have done my research about the country so I know what I am on about, obvs there has been a lot in the press in the past, but its pretty settled their now, and as I said my Dad works for a security company, so I'll be pretty safe. Fuck it, you know what I've had enough of all her shit, she blamed for the things at the house, then didnt contact me for AGES I made the first move obvs, I was always the one who you txt and see if she wanted to do something. I know I will say this, then she'll do something that will produce an entry like last night's, but at least I'm cool now still need to decide what I am going to do, but I reckon go first and then come back for a couple of weeks, but then it all depends on if that works, if not maybe go for all of it.....
Need to speak to Dad n M and then we can work it out...
So thats where my head is at now, and when I say now, it will probs change sometime over the weekend, because thats how I am, insecure brap brap.

May 30th, 2013

Pragging outtttt

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Ed
I hate hate HATE this feeling, what makes it worse is that I wont even see her till end of July/August, so its gonna be niggling till then. SERIOUSLY. What did I do, I really dont know. This shouldn't be the things playing on my mind right now, but istead of thinking about the important decisions I have to make, THIS is there.
THANK YOU LJ for letting me anonymously vent my anger to basically no-one.
I have not felt like this is a VERY long time, cheers mate. Seriously why do you always manage to have this affect on me. I respect you so much, and value your friendship maybe the most, but sometimes you just make me feel like shit.
You lifted my spirits the other day, and again your concern warmed me, but as I try to put your mind at ease, you seem to take it in the wrong light, what did you want me to do?! Seriously I just wanted to put your mind at ease.




Till next time LJ.

Peace Out x
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March 14th, 2013

Ghana

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Ed
Well I am going to get this back up and running, but not as a prang out, but as a way of documenting my 2 months in Ghana with Gyapa.

So its almost at the end of my first working week with Gyapa Social Enterprise. So far I have been to see where some of the guys make the Gyapa stoves, and today we went to a market and put on a demonstration for Gyapa v Traditional Cook Stoves, AKA Stove-Off.

I am also going to be using Tumblr to photo document the things I see. This is my Tumblr; http://www.tumblr.com/blog/izboz

October 20th, 2011

(no subject)

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Ed
ahahahaha, I read through this the other day, I am a prrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrk, and do love a good prang. I can't believe how much I freaked out at the end of 3rd year, perhaps it was because I was pre-empting what was coming, and just wanted to make sure the last couple of months all in Brights together was super/awesome/wonderfulllll.

Life is cool, working at the hotel at the marina with V, shit pay, shit hours but a jobs a job atm.

K needs to move down soon, because its pending I miss her more.

I would like a job with normal hours and decent pay now, thank youuuuuuu.

Peace.x

June 19th, 2011

(no subject)

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Ed
Well its meant to be summer, but it has rained almost everyday since we have finished, BUT less than a week till holidayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.

Oh im a bit pranging, not as much as I was though

Peace.x

May 30th, 2011

Insomnia

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Ed
For one time this week i wanted to go sleep early but i cant. Now i am emotioning, i just want to cry to get it all out, i feel as if no-one cares, im just everyones go to person, for answers. but i dont want just that, i dont wqant to be someones friend cause they think i can help them, im a nice person, and im funny, but sometimes its though you dont appreciate me. you lot make me prang, but you know what i love you guys so much and you mean so much that i dont mind, and i prang because i dont want to lose you as friends. the truth will out soon, and look there u are.

(no subject)

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Ed
So fucking close to the end, finish tuesday 2pm. WTF even is that?!

I just got really reflective about first year, miss hanging out with the guys from flat 3, but I guess I have moved on, even J says they are boring and mainly hangs out with the geography massssiiiveeeeeeee.

On a work front cant wait for it to be over, but FUCK real life.

Glad some people are going to be out of my everyday life though, complaining CONTINUALLY about how shit Brighton is, well actually its the BEST place ever and the BEST thing that has happened to me. Have met the BEST people and bar the odd prang the most happy i have ever been. Man coming to brights was the bes decsion I could of ever made, love love love it.
Such a shame we cant all afford to stay down here, would be amaze, i really hope K moves down. Or at least closer, or better yet, I get my arse into gear and learn to drive, and get a car and erggg more money.

So excited for social, going out, holiday, besti, struggle to find a job, YES SUMMER, I'm so ready for you.



Peace.x

April 21st, 2011

(no subject)

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Ed
Reckon I'm on about 8500 words for my dissertation which pleases me greatly.
Pushed myself in the gym today, so had a really productive day. Shattered now, but its for a good cause.
Gym and library are shut till tuesday though :/ hope I can be productive at home. Going to go for a run on Saturday, to make up for the lack of gym and aim to be on 10,000 words by that night, then I can give myself sunday and monday off, maybe a bit of hospitaly?!

Peace.x

April 19th, 2011

Escapism

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Ed
Joined the uni gym today, going to exercise my problems away, and hopefully lose some weight, and tone up at the same time :)
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April 16th, 2011

Pranging out

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Ed
Maybe its because she is not here, maybe its because I am trying to find something else to think about rather than dissertation, but I sure am pranging, no replies, messages to everyone else, stupid comments. Its all running round my head.

Also my dreams are pretty horrendous, had a fair few relationship dreams, had a marriage dream,one about my dads ex, I smacked HAHAHAHHAHAHAHA. One where I was crying about the C and L situation to K and C. I need all this to stop or for K to let me speak to her about all these dreams, I wake up feeling down, its not fun, especially when I am meant to be doing dissertation work :/

FFS

Peace.x
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